Shiloh Rose Archive

My brain can be quite rude when it comes to lazy days, I often feel guilty for resting! I know that rest is a necessary part of life but for some reason I resist it. This issue has worsened over time, especially after being a stay at home mom. Society often portrays being an SAHM, as some pampered princess that gets to stay home in pjs all day! However, that is not my experience, I feel burnout because there is no clocking out!

There is great strength in learning the art of rest, and trusting that you are held. God asks us to work six days and take one day for rest and reflection. If God rested on the seventh day, then there is a purpose! My opposition to taking days to do nothing, really makes me feel unproductive. I am a very task oriented person, and I have a lot of restless energy. I can’t sit still for very long, it drives my husband crazy! I will wake him up on off days and want him to get up and be busy with me. I know that’s not a good trait, but it’s hard to break! I pray I can get better at being still and resting.

Reflection comes easy for me I quite enjoy deep, reflective thinking. It’s part of my writer nature, I love spending time in the quiet, reading, writing and contemplating life. I believe that my need for busyness and restless energy comes from a place of hurt. I have had people in my life make me feel less than and often gave me a complex, because their assumptions about me. They assumed that I was lazy and wasn’t motivated which wasn’t entirely true. I struggled deeply with self worth and often would give up on projects because lack of encouragement. The need for validation has to be broken in my life. I am so grateful for growth and wisdom.

The greatest gift we can give to ourselves is acceptance of who we truly are and live unashamedly! The judgement of others who cannot know our thoughts or intentions must not carry so much weight. I now practice self love, I remind myself that rest is okay. Our productivity is not based on an external measurement but should be based on our own standards. We know our limitations and we should have a sense of knowing if we gave it our all or fell short. I am learning to embrace my role as SAHM mom and not allow anyone to put me in a box.

I do not condone laziness, but I support people seeking to move away from constant busyness as a medal of achievement. When we silence the noise, spend time in reflection and solitude we are more productive. We come back at our goals with a refreshed view, and renewed sense of purpose. GO TOUCH GRASS! Be blessed!

Honestly, I did not for many years consider myself a leader, I was much like little David of the Bible; fine to stay in the background. I have always been to content serving others and supporting their ideas. At times this would prove to be disastrous because following the wrong person’s lead can take you where you don’t want to go! It took many years of God showing me that I was an ambassador for Christ and I was destined for leadership!

The more I became comfortable with trusting myself and leaning into the role, I realized that all leaders do not have to be loud or bossy. Leadership is simply being willing to take accountability and having a willingness to put others first. If only our political leaders would understand this concept! Jesus said “The greatest among you will be your servant,” “For those who humble themselves will be exalted.” (Mathew 23;11-12 ESV) The more our ego fights to rule over others and take without giving first it will not last. The greatest people that have made the most influential impact on a generation are those who poured into others.

Consequently, I do not cringe as often when someone asks if I am a leader, because yes I am. I may be shy at times, have trouble speaking in front of large crowds but the love that Jesus has given me! That love flows through my veins and I feel compelled to share that love in some way. It may be a smile, compliment, an encouraging word, a prayer for an unsuspecting person, giving money, serving the community, supporting others,etc. The ways we can impact the lives of others are countless. I used to desire greatly for a position in my local church, but when those opportunities never seemed to arise I learned to humble down. When I look more within, I realize that it’s more important to serve in the shadows than desire the approval of man.

Some of the greatest leadership moments of my life, were quite simple moments. One day a friend called to tell me how my transformation through Christ, inspired him to be baptized and get to know the Lord. He told me him and his mom were now going to church. The one time that I was on tv and spoke in front of a large crowd, I only remember one woman coming up to me. This lady told me how much I helped her by the words I spoke that day, as I shared my struggles as a young single mother. We may not always know the impact that we make immediately. One of my favorite scriptures “But when you pray, go into your room, and when you have shut the door, pray to your Father who is in the secret place; and your Father who sees in secret will reward you openly…”(Matthew 6:6 NKJV)

We must remember that we are all leaders in various forms, we lead our children, spouses, coworkers, friends, family, neighbors, etc. Although some people have greater influence and may reach a larger number of people we all should be careful of how we lead. “Leadership is action, not position.” God sees the seeds we plant and our rewards will come in many different forms but the greatest reward will be the impact on those we are destined to reach! Do not hide your gifts and talents, share them and touch someone with your light! Happy Reading!

My children are my motivation 100%!

“Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord, the fruit of the womb a reward. Like arrows in the hand of a warrior are the children of one’s youth. Blessed is the man who fills his quiver with them! He shall not be put to shame when he speaks with his enemies in the gate.”
‭‭Psalm‬ ‭127‬:‭3‬-‭5‬ ‭ESV‬‬

They motivate me to be a better version of myself. I tell them all the time that they are my greatest work. I have five beautiful children, three boys and two girls! We are a big blended family, and I get to stay home and be with them. I also homeschool our children so that I can raise them in the fear and admonition of the Lord.

I remember a time in my life as a young mother, I was off course but just really trying to do the right things. I have always been such a people person and a caregiver personality that I often would be in friendships and relationships that were truly not worth my time. I was surrounding myself with people that didn’t care about the journey I was on. When you take the higher road many people will not want to go that’s what I have learned!

At the time, my son was around three and he was very inquisitive always asking questions and wanting to understand the world. He seemed to know the right things to ask that would have me contemplating my own life. During this time I had started partying again after a long stretch of sobriety. I had started smoking weed regularly and doing cocaine from time to time and losing sight of who I wanted to be.

I remember one day he flat out told me that he did not like it when I smoked. He was three but he could see the change in my behavior and he knew it was wrong. I remember sitting there completely off guard not sure how to respond. A small voice inside nudged me and confirmed that this wasn’t the lifestyle I truly desired. It did not represent the mother I had once been or the mother I knew he needed.

However it took me a few months to truly listen and realize how my actions were hurting our life. I took the hard roads so many times, and yet they all led back to God. His plan for me shone through all of my running, and all of my darkness. That love reached in a pulled me up and I found myself again.

Today, I am happily sober, and my beautiful firstborn is turning thirteen soon! He and his siblings will always motivate me because they are my life, and like Jesus I gladly lay it down for them.

May the Lord bless you and keep you!

I usually start by writing them down, and then I pray about them. I also try and think about how long it should take to accomplish each one. After I set a timeframe that I would want to be done with the goal, I try and look at that particular list often. Sometimes I can admit I do not get them accomplished in the timeframe that I originally set. However, I love journaling and going back and look at those goals and marking them off, it’s very satisfying. I am a firm believer that we plan our way as the Bible says but that God establishes our steps!

It was around Christmas time and I had bought several Starbucks gift cards to give out to family. After finishing up my shopping, wrapping and the busyness of the holidays. I really felt like I wanted to do something for someone. I am a firm believer that acts of kindness shouldn’t be done in a showy manner. I don’t want to put someone on the spot. I prefer to bless them quietly.

This particular day, I was at the library with my children and I decided that I would find someone to give the gift card. I wrote a little note on a sticky note and attached it to the tiny, coffee cup shaped gift card. “May the Lord bless you and keep you and make his face shine upon you.” I knew I wanted the element of surprise. I love a special find! Have you ever found money on the ground and no one was around? In that moment you get a bit of excitement because you realize you can keep it!

I walked around the children’s section looking for the perfect place to put the card. I thought to myself, it’s really small so it needs to be in a place it won’t get overlooked. The sticky note was bright colored so I decided to put it on the book cart. The car that the staff uses to put away books. After I left it there we had to get home and finish our day.

Although I do not know who found my little blessing I pray that it made them smile. I sort of hoped it would stumble upon a person that needed a bit of encouragement. Many times in my days of discouragement, I often long for something like this to happen to me. A gentle reminder that I am seen by a GREAT, unseen God and he knows my heart! That we matter to him, even though we may feel insignificant in the chaos’s of this world.

I can remember a day I was feeling really low, I was upset and crying. I had just had an argument with my husband and he said some really hurtful things. I decided to jump in the car and get away to think. I knew I needed gas so I headed to the gas station. When I got to the pump there was a guy there finishing up. I literally had just been praying for something good, for a sign. That sign was about to show up quicker than I expected. God isn’t in my timeline and most of my prayers do not manifest for quite some time.

Suddenly, the guy at the pump comes up to my car, he looks oddly familiar. I cautiously roll down the window, and see what he wants. He tells me that he has a big discount on gas and that I can use it. Kroger gas stations give 10-70 cents off for their customers. He asks if I can just give him the cash for my gas and that way I can just keep pumping on his current transaction. I tell him that I don’t have cash. He then says that it’s fine, he will still let me use it. So ultimately the guy pays for my gas. I also realize that I do recognize him, he was a pest control guy and he had just been to my house a short time ago!

Consequently, I said all this to say we never know how much someone needs those acts of kindness. The world is dark and the light can be hard to see, be the light! Show the kindness that you need! Blessings to you all, thanks for reading!